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I Can’t Believe I’m Still Single: From Portland to Portland Second Season Finale

Okay, so all I am saying is– if you have a television show and best selling book proclaiming that you have no idea why you are single? Me thinks you need a cup full of clue serum.

Readers: you might want to proceed with caution. This show is definitely scandalous and talking about the show will include mentioning some risque topics. Definitely rated R.

From the ShowTime website:

“Like all relatively smart, funny, attractive men I’ve always believed that when I was ready, I could easily land a smart, funny, sexy, warm, loving wife. ‘When you build it, she will come.’ That’s what you’re told all your life as an American man. The girls are just going to line up when you say the word. Well, my friends, I’m ready and have been for seven years now and I can’t even meet someone I want to have a second date with let alone make my wife.

My last girlfriend left me on my knee with a ring in my hands and tears in my eyes. Initially the tears were of happiness, since she had said she wanted to get married for the previous two years and whenever I was ready, we would do it. Unfortunately, somewhere along the line she changed her mind but didn’t feel it necessary to let me know. She thought it best to wait until I was proposing to drop the guillotine, humanitarian that she was.

Since then I’ve tried speed dating, Yentas, blind dates, Internet dating, meeting girls at the gym and yoga, on the subway and on the street. Actresses, models, lawyers, social workers, teachers, comediennes, even hookers, special massage girls and dominatrixes and nothing! I simply cannot believe I’m still single at 35! (44) This is my story. Just a regular guy looking for love and unable to find it… so far.”

So, I’ve never seen the show. But in doing research about the show, well… it’s smut. It’s smut under the premise that someone is looking for love. There are plenty of stories about stories about masturbation and being anally violated… it’s definitely not something you should sit down with a bowl of popcorn and your kids and think that you should watch it together.

The season finale airs tonight, on ShowTime. I suggest watching with caution– or if you are too cheap to go to the hidden room at the movie rental store.

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