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Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart Ready To Rally in D.C.

Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert are ready to battle it out in D.C. The Comedy Central anchors announced on Thursday that they would hold dueling rallies in the nation’s capitol on October 30th.

Stewart invited his audience to the “Rally to Restore Sanity”, for people “who have been too busy to go to rallies.” The Daily Show gathering will be held on the National Mall and Stewart is hoping to draw a million moderates who can “beg America to stop shouting, throwing and drawing Hitler mustaches on people other than Hitler (or Charlie Chaplin).”

If you’re not sure you are the right type of person to attend such a rally, you definitely are. “You may be asking yourself … ’but am I the right person to go to this rally?”’ Stewart said during last week’s announcement. “The fact that you would even stop to ask yourself that question as opposed to just jumping up, grabbing the nearest stack of burnable holy books, strapping on a diaper and pointing your car towards D.C. – that means I think you just might be right for it.”

Of course, not to be outdone, Jon’s Comedy Central cohort, Stephen Colbert will be holding his own rally to “Keep Fear Alive” on the National Mall at the same time. Colbert is asking all “freedom-loving patriots” to come together and challenge Stewart and his “dark, optimistic forces trying to take away our Fear”.

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